Nets Post-Up: P*#@y!

Nets Post-Up is a stream of consciousness post without editing. Luckily, the author can filter profanity, possesses excellent grammar, and isn’t lazy about spelling. Basically, he’s amazing.

We’ve all seen the videos of New Jersey Nets majority owner, Mikhail Prokhorov jet-skiing, mingling with the ladies, and even handling guns. To me, that screams the following terms – chest rug, Magnum P.I. mustache, and multiple cojones utilization. Apparently, not so to Dallas Mavericks owner, Mark Cuban. According to the Daily News, Cuban thinks Prokhorov is a “p*#@y”:

If this turns into anything more than playful teasing from one outspoken NBA owner to another, let it be known that Mark Cuban threw the first punch at Mikhail Prokhorov.

And he started with a haymaker.

“He’s a p—y,” Cuban quipped Thursday when asked about Prokhorov.

Do I honestly think Cuban means it? I mean, let’s look at the aforementioned evidence of basic pimpitude. It’s basically undeniable that Prokhorov, in fact, isn’t a vajayjay. Unless, you are what you… well, does a real man need to do that too? Maybe Prokhorov is packing heat, packing heat. Pause.

In any case, let’s continue to look at Cuban’s remark the same way we look at Cuban during these type of situations when he bloviates – a joke. Something less than serious. A great sound byte. Just another reason to admire Cuban.

I’m fairly certain that Prokhorov will take it as manly ribbing. You know, just two guys in a barber shop slinging racial epithets, questioning each others’ sexual preference, and your basic “I know you are, what am I?” comments as Clint Eastwood’s character in Gran Turino. Excellent movie, by the way.

So, now we wait for Prokhorov’s verbal volley. I predict it will be something like this, “Your lady tells me that not everything is big in Texas.” Oh! Sick burn!

Terrence Williams Returns

I know that a few influential people around the NBA blogosphere (our own Mark Ginocchio included) thought that the Nets, specifically Avery Johnson, was wrong to send T-Will to the D-League. However, I had no problem with it. Sure, it’s hindsight now since Williams is back up with the Nets, but if T-Will was actually deserving of discipline for the basics of getting to work on time, then a punishment like this (and let’s be real, this was a punishment and nothing more) is more than fine with me.

As Mark mentions, the Nets threatened T-Will last season with sending him to the D-League, but never did. I think it’s great that the organization finally followed through and Williams had to hear his mother cry and a 12-year-old drop some science on him for him to get.  Well, get it, allegedly. We’ll see how it pans out, but it looked like T-Will was definitely looking to slash more, especially in the beginning, as opposed to just settling for a three-pointer or jump shot as he would have previously.

We even got to see him play the point, thanks to Devin Harris hurting his shoulder, which brings me to…

Devin Harris is a Hardy Boy

During the late 1990s/early 2000s, the Hardy Boyz were one of the most exciting WWF (World Wrestling Federation) tag teams on its roster. Some consider them one of the best ever because of their high-flying acts that would put their bodies in supreme danger. Jump off the top a ladder? No problem. Sail from 50 feet above the ring unto a table? Sure, no sweat. The Hardy Boyz put on a show and they were productive… when healthy.

Harris is much like the Hardy Boyz in that he means well, but sometimes, he needs to take it easy. I’m not saying he should stop attacking the basket or anything because he can penetrate and convert at the stripe. However, he’s so valuable that I don’t want to see him get hurt. After seeing him deflect a sure alley-oop by jumping up high and then landing awkwardly, I thought to myself, “Oh shiznit. Not again.”

Be careful, Devin. And if you start to wear black nail polish, I’ll know to trade you fast in my various fantasy basketball leagues.

Speaking of making trades…

If I Were Billy King

I’d definitely be dressing a lot better than this slob look I’m currently wearing, first of all. Second, I’d look to trade for either O.J. Mayo, who has been relegated to the Memphis Grizzlies bench and hasn’t performed as well coming off the pine, or Nicolas Batum, who won’t produce as much with the evolution of Wesley Matthews going down in Portland.

What to give up? Kris Humphries, who is doing great, but also carries trade value (performing well and being in the last year of his contract) and draft picks. Of course, a one-for-one isn’t available to be done due to salary cap restrictions, but adding pieces and draft picks should get it done. I’d lean more towards getting Batum because he’s a jack-of-all-trades that can hit the three, play defense, and will do whatever is asked of him. No D-League for him.

Things I’m Disappointed About

Brook Lopez thinks he’s playing a wing position for the most part this season.

Things I’m Happy About

Lopez started to go down in the post more often lately.