Nets crushed by Jazz, become Worst Worst Blizzards of All-Time


Final: 01/22/2016

L 86 108

It’s too bad the blizzard didn’t cancel this one.

If this was their audition to say: hey, David Blatt, it’s really, truly not that bad here, come coach, it certainly will not coax the recently fired guru to save the franchise. The Nets failed to snap their four-game losing streak in style and were run off the floor mid-way through the third, shooting like they were trying to get out before the snow started falling.

In stark comparison to their loss against the Toronto Raptors this week, there was no overwhelming scoring leader tonight in Brooklyn; instead, a heady, honest team-effort — and yet, we were still subjected for 48 minutes of this train-wreck. Something tells me these were the very type of loses that Lionel Hollins had nightmares about towards the end of his tenure.

It is what it is — if that sounds defeatist, that’s because it is. Sure, you’re guaranteed to run into problems while relying on Wayne Ellington, Joe Johnson, and Andrea Bargnani to anchor your defense, but that’s neither here nor there.

And sure, they only scored 40 points in the first half, lead by Ellington’s 9 points on 3-8 from the field, but pickers can’t be choosers. And sure, the Nets would kill for Gordon Hayward, Rudy Gobert, and, of course, Derrick Favors — but when you have ten total rebounds at halftime, you’ve just got to pick battles you have some chance of winning.

Look, I try to be optimistic, I really do — but against a battered, young Utah Jazz team, there’s simply no excuse for a 20-point loss.

On the eve of a potentially historic blizzard in New York, the Nets drubbing against the Jazz made us shiver, sending us nauseatingly back to the worst snowstorms of all-time. Of course, I don’t mean the literal worst, as in inches, feet, or damage — no, because that would, in turn, insinuate that the Nets are good at basketball.

The Brooklyn Nets: the Worst Worst Blizzards of All-Time.

Brook Lopez


The stats: 8 PTS, 4-8 FG%, 3 RBS, 2 STLS, 3 TOs

Brook Lopez is a Hawaiian Blizzard from Dairy Queen.

Who allowed this to be a flavor of ice cream served at such a classic desert establishment?

Lopez, who finished with just three rebounds, and was constantly engulfed by Gobert’s monstrous frame. Worse, he struggled to defend the pick and roll and was ill-equipped to stop Gobert from dunking whenever he wanted.

Ice cream is still ice cream, even when it’s pineapple and coconut flavored, but this was a bad, bad night for the franchise player.